Johnson & Johnson commercials showcase the glorious highlights of being a new mom: the cuddles, the sweet whispers, the giggles. These moments are real and priceless and life-changing.
I had such new mommy moments that melted my heart and literally brought me to tears: one of my favorite memories was our first family nap. Life felt so complete. And I wept with joy when My Hubs popped in to sit by My Girl’s bilibed for 15 minutes before heading back to work. In that moment, I realized what an awesome dad he is.
These are the moments so many moms-to-be envision while pregnant. We get excited about having a snuggle buddy, feeling complete, having so much awesomeness in our life. We are blinded by the anticipation of becoming what we’ve always wanted to be: a mom.
But when the newborn comes home, reality hits. The tears begin to fall – joyous tears but the unexpected terrible tears too.
The terrible tears are exhausted tears, hormonal tears, I-don’t-know-what-I’m-doing tears; painful tears that come with attempting to take the first poop since popping out a baby; embarrassed tears that swell up when trying to remember if our teeth have been brushed in the past two days; overwhelmed tears that fall as it takes two hours to prep for a 15 minute trip outside the house; confused tears that arrive when a natural thing like breastfeeding doesn’t come naturally at all; sorrowful tears that are hushed when we wonder “Am I the first mom to feel this way?”
You are experiencing new mommyhood and the joys and the terribleness it encompasses. Yes, I said it – caring for a newborn can be terrible. But admitting there are awful moments doesn’t eliminate the awesome ones.
Being a new mom is a mix of joy & exhaustion, love & self-doubt, empowerment & defeat. But isn’t everything that’s worth a damn?